On the first night after my canine Baxter died, I felt sad and tired. but there were two other emotions I didn’t expect: calm and surprised. To be much more accurate, I was amazed by how calm my mind was.
Baxter had been sick for months. For the last two weeks of his life, he had been very, very sick.
I fed him by syringe, picked him up when he didn’t have the strength to get up himself, slept on the living room couch when he didn’t come to his bed in the bedroom, and been with him (or organized to have someone with him) constantly.
I had been hyper-focused on him. and I didn’t realize how much I had been listening, viewing and thinking about him until I wasn’t.
That quiet in my mind was a substantial relief.
Dog owners experience an emotional rollercoaster after a dog’s death. sorrow and loss are the first that come to mind, but there are numerous much more beyond sadness and tears.
I’m Julia, and I write frequently for That Mutt. I’m also a blogger over at home on 129 Acres.
Feeling relief After a canine Dies
When a pet is sick, as Baxter was, their death may bring some relief. relief that your canine isn’t suffering anymore. but also relief that you don’t have to care for him.
Taking care of Baxter those last few weeks was all-consuming. I had done it willingly, and I would have continued if I thought he was still enjoying his life or if there had been a chance he would recover. but it was stressful. I miss my dog, absolutely, but when he died I was relieved that I wasn’t in that anxious, hyper-vigilant state anymore.
Baxter
Loneliness After a canine Dies
Dogs are our companions. For Baxter and me, that implied every night after I put our daughter to bed, it was just us. He wasn’t a terrific conversationalist, but he listened without judgment and was someone to speak with when the house was quiet.
Ellie and Baxter
Even if you don’t speak with your dog, their presence can be a comfort. Seeing them curled up beside you, listening to them pad along the floor, or having them nudge your hand when they want a pet is part of our routine. We have distinct relationships with our dogs and we can feel lonely when they’re not with us.
Disruption in routine After a canine Dies – emotional Rollercoaster
Dogs are part of our daily lives. Their deaths cause changes in our routines. In the days right away following Baxter’s death, I would catch myself listening for him or I’d wake up in the morning and think about letting him outside, only to realize he wasn’t there.
The most significant change for me was our afternoon walks. I loved walking out over our fields with Baxter every day. connecting with nature, our farm and our canine recharged me.
Baxter
Baxter’s death changed that. I don’t have to opt for a walk anymore. I still go outside and walk practically every day, but in some cases I get caught up in work or whatever our daughter wants to do and don’t take this time for myself.
When I do make it out, the walks feel different without our furry golden boy.
It can take time to adjust to your new life without your dog, and the change can feel unpleasant for awhile. It’s an emotional rollercoaster after a dog’s death, for sure.
Feeling freedom After a canine Dies
It has now been practically 9 months because Baxter’s death. I miss having a canine in my life. but there is a part of me that is enjoying some of the freedom of not having a dog.
At the end of the night, I can just go to bed. I don’t have to put on a coat and shoes and take the canine outside. I can leave home during the day and not view the clock thinking I have to be home to take the canine for a walk.
But… then we go to a canine friendly store and I see someone there with their canine and wish we were too. Or we opt for a hike and I think making time for daily walks would be no big deal.
Feeling Guilty After a canine Dies
That feeling of freedom may result in feelings of guilt for some canine owners. I can’t say that guilt is something I’ve felt much with Bax, but taking care of a sick canine takes a lot of time.
Lindsay (the owner of this blog) shared that after her canine Ace’s death, she felt guilty. Not guilty about Ace’s death but guilty for feeling “free” from taking care of him.
“Suddenly I had two extra hours in my day not caring for him and it was both heartbreaking and freeing,” she said.
Es
“It took a couple of hours a day to get him outside for his potty breaks, attempt a very, very slow walk, to give him his medications anD for at sikre, at han spiste noget. Jeg elskede at tage sig af ess og ville gøre det igen i et hjerteslag. Men da han gik forbi, følte jeg mig skyldig, fordi jeg var helt fri for det ansvar. ”
Hun sagde også, at hun var begejstret over muligheden for at bruge meget mere tid sammen med sin yngre hund, Remy. Det var meget at splitte tid mellem omsorg for en senior hund og træne en ungdom. Nu havde hun pludselig hele tiden hele tiden til at bruge udøve og træne sin yngre hund. Du kan læse meget mere om disse følelser her.
Sjov med en ny hund – Emotional Rollercoaster fortsætter
Gratis tid gælder naturligvis ikke, hvis du tilføjer en ny hund til din familie bedst væk. Eller du har måske allerede en anden hund i din husstand.
I min vens tilfælde kom en bassethunde hvalp deres vej under deres gamle hunds sidste par uger. Valpen bragte ny glæde for deres familie – herunder deres oprindelige hund – selv som de kæmpede med hans tilbagegang.
“Jeg har aldrig planlagt på en ‘erstatning’ hund, mens han levede, men hun fandt os, og det gjorde sine sidste to uger meget mere fulde af livet,” siger hun.
Lige fra starten fik de to hunde sammen. Den ældre hund fandt ny energi til at spille og jage, og da han havde brug for en hvile, sov hvalpen ved siden af ham.
En anden hund, hvad enten den er ny eller allerede en del af din pakke, kan bringe lykke og komfort, når du sørger for tabet af din hund.
Hvorfor mister man en hund så smertefuldt?
En hund er en væsentlig del af din familie. Han fylder en rolle, som ingen andre kan. Ligesom hver hund er en person, oplever vi hver især død og sorg på vores egne måder. Dine følelser er din egen, og jeg håber, at du kan acceptere dine følelser, uanset hvad de er, som du går igennem denne udfordrende tid.
Hvad er nogle af de følelser, du har oplevet efter et kæledyrs død?
Vil du beskrive et kæledyrs død som en følelsesmæssig rutsjebane?
Lad os vide i kommentarerne.
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Julia Preston skriver for den mutt om hundeadfærd adfærd og træning, arbejdshunde og liv på hendes gård i Ontario, Canada. Hun har en sød, laid-back boxer mix ved navn Baxter. Hun er også en blogger derhjemme på 129 hektar, hvor hun skriver om hendes eventyr af land Living og DIY renovering.